I’m not going to lie. Before I fell pregnant I used to get really really freaked out about the thought of breastfeeding. I used the think I would never do it. Then something changed, I was pregnant and wanted the best for my unborn child.

Hubby and I went to NCT classes and we discussed breastfeeding – it was all a minefield of buzz words such as “let down” the only let down I was used to was a friend not showing up to a pre-arranged night of cocktails!

I’d said during those last days of pregnancy that I would give it my best shot and if it didn’t work out I would have tried my best. In all honesty I was scared about how it would feel. People give you all the horror stories, I was armed and ready with nipple barrier creams and cabbage leaves!

After the birth I was so high on drugs I don’t recall the skin to skin time, my only memories are those which I have taken from photos. An hour after he was born he was on my nipple, I have no recollection of how he got there – I can only presume the midwife did it as I just remember being so drunk with utter adrenaline and shock. I can say that he latched instantly, it was mesmerising and magical. It didn’t hurt at all and I couldn’t take my eyes off of him enjoying my milk, the bond was instant.

So day 1-3 the panic ensued. Due to a prolonged stay in hospital I was able to glean midwife support with feeding. I struggled to sit upright on my stitches and found it hard to lift him in and out the cot. I recall by day 3 panicking that he wasn’t getting enough food as I’d fed for 6 hours solid and he was still screaming. The midwives assured me it was normal and that he was feeding so much to tell my body he needed the milk to “come in”.. sure enough like clockwork day 4 came and so did the hugely engorged boobs and waking to a pool of milky wetness in my bed. The NCT class didn’t tell you about that! Be sure to keep breastpads handy as I was leaking everywhere! I found lanisoh disposable the best at the time.

We are now 13 weeks into our breastfeeding journey and what a journey it has been! In the first few weeks my supply was so abundant that Max would projectile it all back up, this is fairly frustrating when your boobs are already empty and nipples raw.

Hubby finds it hard as he panics when he is left in charge of Max, armed with no boobs he worries he can’t settle his son. I recall in the first few weeks going shopping and Max needing booby, mummy was in Debenhams buying a new perfume much to daddy’s anger!

Recently we have issues with Breastfeeding  in public – Max keeps pulling away and screaming. I’ve invested in a large feeding scarf and I really need to consider whether expressing a bottle for use in public is the way forward.



Breastfeeding truly is a magical bond and I would highly recommend anyone at least trying it with their baby. You may be suprised.


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