Is there ever a right time for a second?

It’s Christmas Day, it’s 2:30am, I’ve been wide awake for the past hour unable to sleep. I’m 33 but yet seems tonight I’m 8 years old again, hyperactive on an overdose of sugar and buffet food and eagerly anticipating the arrival of Father Christmas down the chimney.

Actually for some bizarre reason I’m wide awake not excited for Santa, but, debating in my mind when the right time comes for a second baby!

Lately a few friends have moved onto baby number 2, I follow a fair few people on Instagram who have also ventured into the world of a second baby and it’s gotten me thinking, when IS the right time for another?

On my Christmas party this year I was plagued with the reoccurring question from colleagues and I simply couldn’t answer.

So here I am at 2:30am on Christmas thinking about it. I know if I had another I seriously would not want to repeat the pregnancy and birth experience from the first. I think it is those points that are acting as major contraceptive at the moment.

Then secondly comes my career. When I had Max I seriously felt like I’d chosen my baby over my career and purposefully put my job on hold to have a family. Excellent choice at the time but now I feel miles behind my male counterparts having had a year off. I think if I got pregnant again it would be met with a lot of negative vibes at work. I’d be worrying sick about my career and what life would look like after number 2 for me career wise.

Thirdly there’s the finances – now I have a good job, my husband does ok, but with baby number 1 we managed to save a chunk of cash so I could go off and have a year off. This time, we have no savings. So how could we possibly afford for me to take a year out of work? I simply couldn’t. I think this would leave me feeling a bit sad inside.

So having reviewed points 1-3 above I think it’s safe to say I’m not ready, but those points will always exist.

  1. Is it normal to just have one baby?
  2. Why do I feel such immense pressure to do it again?
  3. How will baby 2 make me feel?

Really keen to get thoughts and comments!

Rebecca

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One thought on “Is there ever a right time for a second?

  1. There was never a great time for having the first baby, but we always knew that we wanted two. So once we got started, we had them both within three years of each other. The biggest difference is that now there is no end to the chores. It’s just constant chores. But they are interacting more now that he’s almost a year. It’s all trade-offs. 🙂

    Like

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